The erratic adventures of shay & jax
Well, maybe not all. Just the cute ones. Like Roger. And why, I hear you ask? Well, I dunno. Maybe it's the rugged jawline, or the burly, muscled frame, or the sensitive poets soul, or the... Okay, got distracted there for a minute! :D Let's try this again: fuck all y'all for not updating your weeblies and generally entertaining me in my coffee breaks. I miss Rice's lunatic rants, memes and inappropriateness. I miss Bagel's snark. I miss the lady behind the Foulquiers in general. I miss Roger's toned abs and perfect buns. *sigh* Anyhoo, let's focus on the positives. It's raining. If it continues to rain for the next week, it will surely aid ticket sales for the beard and moustache competition that the boss and I are hosting next week, in aid of the local air ambulance charities. (Yes, that's right - I dunno how it works in developed countries, but here in the UK, these essential life-saving services exist thanks to ordinary people volunteering their time and money - but that's a whole other rant!) The Ashes is now under way in both the men's and women's forms of the game. I hold out a lot more hope of us being successful in the women's Ashes than the men's, but as neither test has gone the way I expected so far, what the fuck do I know? Other than the fact that Bell just has to be dropped now, as having this bad a run of form in such a highly scrutinised series can surely be doing him no good at all. The result of the women's 2nd one-dayer was disappointing, but the game itself was excellent to watch. Meg Lanning's century was a joy to watch, and her run out of Charlotte Edwards at mid-wicket would have been a thing of beauty, if it wasn't a bleddy Aussie doing it! What else? Well in the strange world of Popmundo, Jax is going to be playing football (I grit my teeth and use soccer when in character, but here? Never!) for Barcelona next season. Well, he's more likely to be watching games from the bench, but such is life. Shay has finally told Lily that he used to be Shayna. Obviously she reacted with the kind of small-minded revulsion that you'd expect from such a intolerant hatemonger. I think we all know that that one is pure evil, a fact further highlighted by her continuing to hide her ongoing relationship from poor Shay. No doubt she plans to reveal the truth when it will cause the most emotional scarring... *attempts a serious face* And, because we haven't had one in forever, bask in the almost impossible loveliness of Gogo Blackwater. Have a good weekend - and write more blogs!
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When checking a Weebly character page because you can't remember if they're a neat freak or not. Relationship status: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!! (This might be vaguely funny if I'd bothered to sort out the whole Jax thing on this, my own Weebly. :P But, hey! Never let that fact that something isn't funny stop you from teasing people about it, right?) So, the UK has voted, and the system that we rather optimistically refer to democracy has rewarded us with one of the most unrepresentative parliaments I can recall. And before anyone accuses me of being a poor loser, the fact is that the UKIP loons should currently have 80-odd seats . The prospect of a Tory/UKIP coalition should terrify any sane person, but at least that would be an honest reflection of the will of the nation. As it stands, our system effectively renders the votes of 2/3 to 3/4 of the electorate meaningless.
And then we wonder why people are disaffected with politics. What I do find quite interesting is how Tory voters seem to be keeping their heads down about the whole thing – or at least they are in public. Three people I know have ‘fessed up. Given that one of them is the daughter of a hedge-fund manager, and the other is a Conservative councillor, I wasn’t surprised by their votes, but I know quite a few other people who are Tory supporters who have been very quiet about the whole thing. Possibly they are feeling a bit sheepish about having cast a vote for five more years of kicking the poor, the disabled, and anyone that doesn’t have a Home Counties accent. The main defence I’ve heard offered for voting Tory is that ‘they’re better than Ed Milliband’. Now I would struggle to argue with the fact that Mr Millibean has spent much of this election campaign making himself look like an unelectable fuckwit, but is he really worse than the party that told us, up front, that it planned to make the most vulnerable poorer, repeal the Human Rights Act (and apparently replace it with something that's like, totally different, and loads better) and jimmy the next election in their favour? Then again, when you’re choosing between a well-meaning idiot and a slick sociopath, it almost makes turd sandwiches and giant douches look appealing. And Argyle are still crap. Anyway, at least my beard is looking good. Priorities an' shit. Busy, busy, busy! Drinky, drinky, drinky! In the last few weeks, we've had our annual trip to Shaldon, a picturesque village nestled on the banks of the river Teign. Me, the Boss, and a few friends go every year to walk for miles along the coast paths, and then eat too much food and drink too much beer. Last year a game of Cards Against Humanity, and a post-Shaldon colouring in competition were added to the mix, which I mentioned here. This year was a bit less walky and even more drinky, when one of our party realised that the only footwear he'd brought with him from Brighton were cowboy boots. Oh dear... However, I did decided that, as I am clearly not unhealthy enough, I'm going to take up smoking a pipe. The following weekend it was the Wessex Beardsmen's beard and moustache competition. As with the Brits last year, I entered the Business Class category, and won nowt. Brook's typist will be so disappointed in me. :/ However, just like at the Brits, we had an absolutely fabulous day, meeting some old friends and making a bunch more. And I had a burlesque artist sniff my beard, which is a first for me. The photos are starting to trickle in. Both the official photographers asked me to look 'serious', but I seem to have ended up looking more 'stern', or possibly even 'a bit stabby...' Yes, I do have a dent in my forehead. Forceps. It's purely aesthetic, and didn't do any real damage. I mean, everyone blacks out for days, and wakes up covered in blood occasionally, right?
The UK goes to the polls soon, and I will avoid talking too much about that here because I will probably start ranting. I will just have a brief froth about the 'if you don't vote, don't complain' posts that are starting to appear everywhere. I'm going to go along and cast my utterly worthless Green vote in a safe Tory seat because, well, because I'm an idiot. And the polling station is next to the pub. However, I live in a democracy that manages to exclude and alienate huge swathes of people - even those that do vote - and then blames them for feeling excluded or alienated. So if you've taken a look at the candidates and don't see anyone you want to vote for, or you've realised that you may as well burn your ballot card for all the political representation actually voting will bring, then I please do moan, whether you vote or not. Please do kick up a fuss. And if you're simplifying the argument down to 'don't vote/don't moan', please take a moment to realise that not all non-voter are not politically engaged. Many are simply opting out of a system they feel is broken anyway. Anyway, what do I know? :P Finally got around to updating Shay's page, and the character page, with his new faceclaim. I may write more about what Shay is up to dreckly. Anyway, go check it out. Or don't. I don't care!!1!1
Still toying with resurrecting Vera to use as Ellis. But toying is as far as it's got. Because... reasons. As an aside, this number of people viewing this site seems to have plummeted since I stopped posting pictures of heavily tattooed ladies. Or maybe it was the cricket talk that had you all hooked? Hmm, I wonder... No-one can deny Feely - he's too damned alpha. Anyway, your hero and mine has instructed me to write a new blog, which is to contain man-faced skanks and steamshit. And who am I to argue? I hope you all had a pleasant Christmas (apart from those of you like Bobs/Dave who lives in some kinda crazy, made up country, and doesn't celebrate it for another day) and, of course, a Merry New Year! Our village pub's fancy dress theme this year was the 1970s, which was annoyingly specific, because if it had just been the 70s, I would have done some 1870s shit. Instead I went as a Jawa. Utinni! I had an enjoyable break, the traditional Christmas cold aside, which I mostly spent watching the darts (big ups to Garry Anderson - Bagel must be very proud) and caning Arrow and The Flash. Utter cheesy nonsense, but fun nevertheless. The final season of The Newroom is up next, then Gomorra. Back to work now, and it's much less horrific than I feared. What's that, you say? Albums of the year? Well, I've been proper crap at listening to new music this year, but the following (IMHO) were all good'uns: Royal Blood by Royal Blood: Big, driving riffs and slightly effeminate vocals. Me likey. Bestiary by Hail Mary Mallon: Classic Def Jux-type Hip Hop which you either love or hate. Needless to say, me likey. The little 50 sample in this track makes me happy. That's Not How You Do That by Jean Grae: A novelty album, yes, but it's had me smiling since the summer. NehruvianDOOM by NehruvianDOOM: MF Doom's name got me to try this one, as I'd never heard of Bishop Nehru. I will be looking out for him in the future, though. Seaside Resort to Violence by Rash Decision: I went to see Monolithian play live, with a bunch of support bands I'd never heard of, and ended up seeing these guys (who have the bass player and vocalist from Monolithian on guitar and backing vocals) play this album, which is an eardrum-melting belter. Drenge by Drenge: Pretty sure this came out at the tail end of last year. So why is it on this list? Because fuck you, that's why! (And also because I didn't hear it until this summer. :P) I have my first Christmas do tomorrow - a famously boozy one with a contractor we do a tonne of work for/with. I generally tend to feel 'delicate' the following day. Pity me. :( From here on in, I firmly believe that my life will be stress, stress and more stress, with a little stress on the side, right up until Christmas, when it will be all gravy (quite literally, in some cases!) This doesn't mean that I won't be around, just that I may be a little frazzled. Shay's new band will be booking shows as of this evening (he said hopefully) and on the road in January. The song writing bug continues to bite, and if anyone fancies scribbling down a song together then let me know. I have openings on the collaboration front now, don't I? Hmm? Hmm?! Yeah, you - you know who I'm talking to... :P I finally got around to watching Guardians of the Galaxy and Pacific Rim. Guardians just flat-out pwns, with great CGI, good action sequences and zingy, campy dialogue. Dave Bautista deapanning Drax the Destroyer is very entertaining. Pacifc Rim is terrible, but terrible in the brilliant way that all kaiju movies should be. Alas, no sexy robots, but you can't have everything! I believe I promised you all heavily tattooed women and cricket references, BUT! I have something even better. That's right peoples, brace yourself for: BREAD'S SOLID FUEL REVIEWZ!!1!!!1l0lNo.1 of ∞: Molacite
Regularly sized processed anthracite briquettes. They light easily and burn right through, but produce quite a lot of ash. Hotter than a motherfucker, but not a particularly slow burn, so don't expect the firebox of your archaic lump of cast iron to keep in for a whole day. Reasonably priced when bought in bulk, and suitable for smoke control zones. I like the mole chewing an ear of corn. And his little hat. 7.5/10 I'm on holiday this week and, theoretically, doing stuff around the house. In actuality I'm sitting on my arse and reading. And doing some work-work, annoyingly. When other people in the office are on holiday, I try everything I can to deal with issues that arise on their jobs. When I am on holiday and something happens on one of my jobs, they call me. But ho hum. Bonuses get paid next week, so strippers and ching* all 'round. I had a serious thunk about mugging off the whole Popmundo thing last week. Shay hasn't really turned out any better than V, and an Etch-a-sketch end of the world is probably called for. But then I thought: what else am I going to do at work? Work? Not if I can help it... :P The official photos from the British Beard and Moustache champs are finally up. I look like I'm about to fire a death ray from my eyes, which I kinda like: Lastly, has the weebly editor gone mEnTaL lately, or is my machine just having a wiggins? Oops! Nearly forgot to mention that I have realised that I could do with a guitarist for Shay's new band. To that end I may resurrect V and repackage her as Ellis. TBC, but if it happens I will figure out a way of letting people know that she isn't the Dead Girl any more. *Note: 'hookers and ching' may be substituted for car repairs and a nice cup of tea without prior warning. The witch is dead. It feels a bit funny, not having to choose a character at the initial screen. Still, as I always chose Shay first, it's nothing I won't get used to. Thanks to everyone for generally not nagging me to change my mind. V hadn't done anything of note in forever, so there really did seem little point in having her knock around any longer. I'll update her page dreckly. Shay is currently getting his arse kicked in LA, and chatting with a rejuvenated Lily - who's woken up after far too long in the land of nod - and a restart who I will not name as it's not my place to. Suffice to say that I'm happy to see them back. :) You should all go and have a shuftie at Lily's weebly. I, on the other hand, am going to get ready for a beer festival! Did you all miss me horribly? What do you mean, you didn't notice that I was gone?! So then, a very pleasant week-and-a-bit off. The stag do was fun, and large quantities of booze were consumed. The only downside that I remember was discovering a pair of soiled underpants under the rug in our apartment while tidying up before breakfast on the first morning. Not what you want prior to cooking everyone a fry-up. Still, over all it was great. If you'd like to raise your glasses in a toast: ladies and gentlemen; the South Hams. I did a little more mooching about on my week off than planned, but I still got a fair amount done. Then, on Friday, it was off up to Bath to prepare for the British Beard and Moustache championships. The day itself was huge fun, with hundreds of hirsute men (nearly 50 entrants in natural beard under 12") and lots of pretty women (most of whom didn't have beards). Not that I was looking, obviously - married man and all that... *shifty eyes* I entered the business class category. I didn't win anything, but looking at the competition I'd say that I was in the top six or seven. My left whisker spend the day stubbornly curling backwards, ruining my symmetry, and maybe costing me a top three slot. Curses! The happy guy I'm standing next to would go on to be crowned British champion in the natural goatee category. Whilst having a few celebratory pints afterwards, he swore me and the boss to secrecy about the fact that there were only four entrants...
In Popmundo news I'm gearing Vera up for a trip to the great big after-party in the sky. It's a shame, but I just don't have any ideas left for the character. If you'd like any of the stuff she's giving away, drop me a line. |
WTF?!This site contains out-of-character information for characters and events in the MMO Popmundo, as well as general navel-gazing and apologies for never updating. "If you are offended by words like: Shit! Bitch! Fuck! Dick! Ass! Whore! Cum!" Ice-T
Who the Hell?!
The author is a professional person in his mid-30s, old-school Hip Hop head, Punk Rock fan, Plymouth Argyle supporter, comic book reader, and general lo-fi nerd. He lives in the countryside with two cats and newly-wed wife, all of whom seem to be above him in the pecking order. He is a big fan of tea, fig rolls, H.P. Lovecraft, facial hair and quiffs. While MPB robbed him of his quiff-rocking dreams, he does sport a dope handlebar moustache. Categories
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